Feeling Stuck?

Have you ever had one of those days (or weeks, or months) where you just feel stuck? What do I mean by stuck? That feeling that you are not making progress. That you are doing the same thing over and over and nothing is changing. Solving the same problem time after time and knowing that tomorrow you will probably be solving the same problems again. That feeling that you are working really hard but not really achieving anything.

If you do feel that way, I'm going to let you in on a secret - it's not just you. Unless you have talked openly to others about this (and how many of us have done that?), you probably feel like it's just you. That everyone else around you feels fine and is having a great, fulfilling experience. But they probably aren't. That feeling of being stuck is pretty common. Most of us have spent weeks, months or even whole careers feeling like that. It's not much fun. It's draining. Soul destroying. It leads to stress, burnout and just plain unhappiness. Fortunately, there is something you can do about it.

CoachingDave Martin1 September 2020capability building, complexity, development, coaching, psychologyComment

Coaching And The Drama Triangle

You have walked into a firestorm. On the first day, management takes you aside and tells you that the teams just aren't up to scratch. They are always late, they don't have the skills, they don't care about business outcomes. Don't they realise that If we don't make the date, the company will struggle? Can you please go in and fix them?

On the second day, the teams tell you about management's unreasonable demands and how they are working late nights and weekends, with no recognition, struggling with poor equipment and environments, slow processes and constant micromanagement. Can you please get management off their backs and let them get on with it?

Day three you turn up and have both sides looking at you with pleading in their eyes, expecting you to come to the rescue and solve their problem. Welcome to the Drama Triangle. The Drama Triangle comes out of the family therapy area and was first described way back in 1968 by Stephen Karpman. The Drama Triangle states that in many interpersonal conflicts, people will assume one of three roles - the victim, the persecutor and the rescuer.

CoachingDave Martin3 December 2019coaching, communication, psychologyComment